|
Sean Campbell, 15, has plenty of friends, and his mom knows them all very well. “Most of his close friends, I would say I know their character. I know their values. I know that their parents are on the same page,” says Rashida Campbell. “They’re all nice. They’re all trustworthy as friends; they don’t really do anything wrong,” says Sean. “I personally feel most of his friends are just good 16 year olds,” says Mrs. Campbell.
Most people would agree that good character and good behavior are important qualities, but why? “Because as the study shows, your teen is very likely to be engaging in the same activities as his or her friends,” responds psychologist Carol Drummond.
According to new research from Columbia University, kids are more likely to take risks if their friends do.
For example, if your child’s friends are sexually active, your child is much more likely to smoke, drink and use drugs. “Yeah, I think that’s true because you’re going to do what your friends do,” says Sean.
Experts say parents have to try hard not to be fooled by their children’s friends. “It is really difficult because some teenagers can be great actors,” says Dr. Drummond, “but I think if parents really trust their gut about how they feel about kids they can gain a lot of insight.”
Instinct isn’t all, she says. Check up on your kid’s friends, get to know their parents, because in the end, the right circle of friends can encourage good behavior — not just bad. “Most of my friends are just like I am,” says Sean. “They’re not doing anything risky or anything, so it’s not like I’m going against the group.”
|
By Amye Walters
CWK Network, Inc.
A study from The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University shows a strong connection between sexual behavior and substance abuse. It further showed that when their friends engage in such risky behavior, teens are more likely to experiment with sex and try illegal substances.
Many parents remain in the dark about their child’s sexual behavior and substance use:
- By ninth grade, 34 percent of teens have had sexual intercourse.
- Among graduating seniors, 60 percent have been in a sexual relationship.
- Fifty-six percent of teens report they have friends who are sexually active.
- Thirty-eight percent of teens have friends who smoke marijuana.
- Forty-eight percent of teens have friends who regularly consume alcohol.
- Thirty-six percent of teens have friends who smoke cigarettes.
Sixteen percent of teens have friends who regularly view and download Internet pornography. If half or more of your teen’s friends engage in such behavior, your teen is more than three times likelier to smoke, drink or use illegal drugs than teens who have no such friends. Forty-five percent of teens attend parties where alcohol is available; 30 percent attend parties where marijuana is available; 10 percent where prescription drugs are available; and nine percent where cocaine or Ecstasy are available.
T eens who report half or more of their friends are sexually active are:
- More than six and one-half times likelier to drink alcohol.
- Thirty-one times likelier to get drunk.
- More than 22 times likelier to have tried marijuana.
- More than five-and-a-half times likelier to smoke tobacco.
|
By Amye Walters
CWK Network, Inc.
CASA chair Joseph Califano says, “The thunder of teen sexual activity and dating behavior may signal the lightning of substance abuse.” Information about young people’s sexual behavior — from the attitudes they have, to the decisions they make, to the actions they take — can help parents communicate with their children.
It is important for parents to know their children’s friends and dating practices to help reduce the likelihood of risky behaviors. T eens report that morals, values and religious beliefs influence their decisions. Teens also indicate their parents play a major role when it comes to decision-making, so it is very important to always keep communication lines open, even when the topic might be uncomfortable to discuss.
- Comprehensive information for parents can be found at: Talking with kids.
- Look to reliable Internet sites, your child’s school or health care provider, or a trusted friend or relative for additional information.
- Discuss your values and morals with your teen. Ask about their values and morals in a non-confrontational manner.
- Twenty-three percent of teens eat two or fewer dinners a week with their family; these teens are more than one and one-half times likelier to smoke, drink or use illegal drugs than those who have five to seven family dinners a week.
- When asked, 42 percent of teens said they would like to “honestly” discuss dating with their parents at dinner; 30 percent feel the same on the topic of substance use.
|
